Random Funny Things to Say in a Text

Ever stared at your phone, wondering what to text next? Say no more. These Random FunnyThings to Say in a Text are here to save the day. They’re weird. They’re silly. They’re guaranteed to make someone laugh. Whether you’re sending random things to text your friends or dropping funny things to say to friends to make them laugh, these lines bring instant fun.

Need a mood boost? Try the most random things to say,from dancing chickens to time-traveling pizza. Got a quiet chat? Liven it up with random texts to make someone laugh. These are perfect random things to text people when boredom strikes. Want laughs? Want chaos? Want confusion in the best way? Just send one of these. Random FunnyThings to Say in a Text are your secret weapon for hilarious chats and laugh-out-loud replies. Let the nonsense begin!

Witty One-Liners – Funny and Random Things to Say

Need a quick laugh? These witty one-liners are perfect for texting, joking around, or catching your friends off guard. Whether you’re sharing random things to text your friends, funny things to say to friends to make them laugh, or just want to drop random texts to make someone laugh, this list brings the weird, the witty, and the wildly unexpected. Save them, text them, laugh at them. These are your go-to random things to text people when silence is not an option.

1. My bed and I are in a committed relationship. 
2. If I were a vegetable, I’d be a cute-cumber.
   
3. I just saw a chicken wearing a tutu. Explain.
   
4. I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m always right. 
5. I whispered to my pizza, but it still left me.
6. Why did the grammar nerd break up with the apostrophe? 
7. I’m starting to think my dog is plotting against me. 
8. I don’t snore,I dream I’m a motorcycle. Vroom. Vroom. 
9. My plants are alive because they’re too scared to die. 
10. If sarcasm burned calories, I’d be invisible by now. 
11. I’m not lazy,I’m just on energy-saving mode forever.
12. If we were in space, I’d still text you nonsense. 
13. I just tried to microwave a spoon. Send help.
14. I named my Wi-Fi “TellMyWiFiLoveHer.” 
15. My fridge is running, and I’m not catching it.
    
16. I’m 100% sure my mirror is lying to me.
17. I talk to myself. We’re both great listeners. 
18. Don’t worry,I bring my own weirdness to the party. 
19. I saw a unicorn-shaped cloud and named it Steve. 
20. If I text you randomly, it’s your fault.
    
21. I fell in love with pizza. It ghosted me.
    
22. I tried cooking today. Fire alarm was not impressive.
    
23. My time machine couch won’t take me anywhere fun.
    
24. I’m not always weird, just on weekdays and weekends.
    
25. Zombies fear me,I confuse them with my dance moves.
    
26. I accidentally wore my shirt inside out. Again.
    
27. If brains were Wi-Fi, mine’s buffering nonstop.
    
28. I tried flirting once. Ended up complimenting a chair.
    
29. I sent a random text and now I have regrets.
    
30. I’m the human version of “Oops, my bad.”

Also Read: 40+ Wedding Anniversary Greetings for Sister

Funny Jokes

Get ready to giggle! These Random FunnyThings to Say in a Text jokes are great for texting friends, breaking awkward silences, or just being goofy for no reason.

1. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
   
2. I told my dog I loved him. He blinked twice and left the room.
   
3. I asked my fridge if it was running. Now I’m chasing it.
   
4. Parallel lines have so much in common… it’s a shame they’ll never meet.
   
5. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing!
   
6. I used to play piano by ear. Now I use my hands.
   
7. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
   
8. I’m not lazy. I’m on energy-saving mode.
   
9. I just burned 1,200 calories. I forgot the pizza in the oven.
   
10. I tried to catch fog yesterday. Mist.
    
11. Don’t trust stairs. They’re always up to something.
    
12. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.
    
13. I told my computer I needed a break. It froze.
    
14. My math teacher called me average. How mean!
    
15. What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved.
    
16. I ordered a chicken and an egg online. I’ll let you know which comes first.
    
17. Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
    
18. I’m great at multitasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.
    
19. I put my phone on airplane mode and threw it. Still didn’t fly.
    
20. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
    
21. I tried writing with a broken pencil. It was pointless.
    
22. I told a joke about a pencil. No point.
    
23. My mood ring is missing. I don’t know how I feel about that.
    
24. I once knew a joke about construction… but I’m still working on it.
    
25. If Apple made a car, would it have windows?
    
26. I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
    
27. I tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes ever.
    
28. I asked the librarian if the library had books on paranoia. She whispered, “They’re right behind you.”
    
29. I used to be indecisive, but now I’m not sure.
    
30. I have an EpiPen. My friend gave it to me as he was dying. It seemed very important to him.

Playful Teasing

Playful teasing is a sign of close friendships. Here are Random FunnyThings to Say in a Text fun, harmless jabs you can send to friends and keep the vibe lighthearted.

1. You’re like a software update,annoying but necessary.
   
2. You bring joy… and chaos. Mostly chaos.
   
3. Your spirit animal is probably a sloth with Wi-Fi.
   
4. You have something on your chin… no, the third one down.
   
5. If you were any slower, you’d be going backwards.
   
6. You’re not lazy. You’re just on rest mode… forever.
   
7. You have something on your face,wait, never mind.
   
8. Your talent for making things weird is unmatched.
   
9. You’re like a puzzle piece from a different box.
   
10. I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.
    
11. You’re not stupid. You just have bad luck thinking.
    
12. Your typing speed is impressive… if this were 1998.
    
13. You act like Wi-Fi is a personality trait.
    
14. How are you always five minutes late, even online?
    
15. You glow different when you’re lying.
    
16. You’re the human version of buffering.
    
17. You’re like a cloud,when you disappear, it’s a great day.
    
18. You should be a warning label.
    
19. If sarcasm was a sport, you’d get a gold medal,and then lose it.
    
20. Your spirit emoji is the loading symbol.
    
21. You’re like a mystery wrapped in confusion.
    
22. You have a bright future in nap-taking.
    
23. You’re the reason group chats go silent.
    
24. You’re the friend that makes bad ideas sound fun.
    
25. You must be tired from running through people’s Wi-Fi limits.
    

Funny Random Things to Say – Silly Talks

Sometimes, random and silly is the best way to keep the conversation rolling. These Random FunnyThings to Say in a Text are weird, unexpected, and absolutely hilarious.

1. Do cows have best friends? Asking for a friend.
   
2. If I barked right now, would anyone notice?
   
3. I think my socks are arguing again.
   
4. I named my pillow Steve. We’re in a serious relationship.
   
5. If I were a sandwich, what kind would I be?
   
6. I just waved at my fridge. It waved back.
   
7. Do you ever just moo to feel something?
   
8. I sneezed and scared my cat. Now we’re not talking.
   
9. My goldfish thinks I’m weird.
   
10. Why does cereal taste better at night?
    
11. I put my phone in the fridge. Again.
    
12. What if clouds are just shy marshmallows?
    
13. If I had a pet potato, I’d name it Spuddy.
    
14. I’m pretty sure my mirror is judging me.
    
15. My brain went offline five minutes ago.
    
16. Is it socially acceptable to wear pajamas all week?
    
17. I think I just saw a squirrel doing yoga.
    
18. If you see me talking to myself, I’m in a meeting.
    
19. I forgot what I was forgetting.
    
20. I bought grapes and named them individually.
    
21. Do you ever wonder if spoons are just tiny shovels?
    
22. My toaster hates me. I just know it.
    
23. I’m planning a fake vacation. Wanna come?
    
24. I believe my blanket has trust issues.
    
25. I just tried to unlock my house with a spoon.
    

Sarcastic Remarks

Sarcasm is the ultimate love language for some friendships. These snarky texts are perfect when you want to keep it real, hilarious, and just slightly offensive,in the best way.

1. Oh, you’re awake? Must be nice to have goals.
   
2. You’re right. I totally needed your unsolicited advice.
   
3. I’m not ignoring you,I’m just on mute emotionally.
   
4. Your opinion has been filed under “meh.”
   
5. Congrats on your ability to breathe and exist.
   
6. You bring chaos into every room. Congrats, legend.
   
7. I’m thrilled you texted. Said no one ever.
   
8. My phone buzzed. False alarm,it was disappointing.
   
9. That idea was almost good. Almost.
   
10. If I wanted nonsense, I’d just talk to myself.
    
11. You’re so smart,like, Google’s threatened.
    
12. Please keep talking. I love fictional stories.
    
13. Wow, your confidence is inspiring…ly misplaced.
    
14. You light up the room. Mostly with confusion.
    
15. I’m jealous of your ability to say nothing.
    
16. Your logic just broke physics. Congrats, Einstein.
    
17. You should write a book: “How to Annoy.”
    
18. Your talent? Turning silence into chaos.
    
19. I learn so much from your poor decisions.
    
20. You make awkward look like an art form.
    
21. You’re like Wi-Fi in an elevator,unreliable.
    
22. I’d agree with you, but you’re wrong.
    
23. Oh look, it’s Captain Overthink in action again.
    
24. I missed your text like I miss traffic.
    
25. You deserve an award,for persistence in nonsense.
    

Random Things to Text Your Friends to Make Them Laugh

These random texts are weird, unpredictable, and weirdly poetic. Perfect when you want to leave your friends wondering if you’re okay,or if they should be laughing.

1. I just blinked too hard and forgot my password.
   
2. Do penguins have knees or just icy swag?
   
3. I just Googled “do clouds ever nap?”
   
4. My spoon tried to escape. We had cereal beef.
   
5. If you laugh at this, we’re officially soulmates.
   
6. I tried petting a squirrel. Now I owe money.
   
7. I bought a plant. It’s already judging me.
   
8. Do frogs ever wish they had eyebrows?
   
9. I just danced in socks and met gravity.
   
10. If you had to marry a vegetable, which?
    
11. My toaster just beeped at me,rude.
    
12. Why is cereal so dramatic when it drowns?
    
13. My foot fell asleep. It’s snoring now.
    
14. Imagine being a ghost stuck in Zoom calls.
    
15. I licked a battery once,felt electric.
    
16. My pizza has trust issues. Keeps sliding.
    
17. Do ants gossip about us walking weirdly?
    
18. I heard cheese sing in the fridge. Help.
    
19. I just screamed into a jar. Therapy?
    
20. Why does bread go bad but never evil?
    
21. I just meowed back at my neighbor’s cat.
    
22. I texted you because I’m allergic to silence.
    
23. My nose itched, so I blamed the government.
    
24. I gave a speech to my laundry today.
    
25. What if your socks are escaping on purpose?
    

Funny Random Things to Say in a Text to a Girl

These texts are playful, totally unexpected, and perfect when you want to make her laugh without sounding too try-hard. They’re quirky, flirty, and 100% original.

1. If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.
   
2. I tried writing you a poem. It’s mostly pizza.
   
3. Just imagined you doing karaoke. Chaos and glory.
   
4. If we were penguins, I’d gift you pebbles.
   
5. You’re like Wi-Fi,when you’re gone, I panic.
   
6. I bet your dog thinks you’re royalty.
   
7. I asked my cereal if you’d text back.
   
8. If you were a song, I’d skip everything else.
   
9. I’d fight a spider for you. Maybe.
   
10. You look like you laugh at your own jokes.
    
11. If being cute was illegal, you’d be jailed.
    
12. I think you stole all the sunshine today.
    
13. You probably make plants grow just by smiling.
    
14. I daydreamed you tripping over nothing again.
    
15. If you were a burrito, you’d be extra.
    
16. Your laugh sounds like confetti.
    
17. If you text me first, I’ll faint cutely.
    
18. I bet you name your plants dramatic things.
    
19. You’d win an award for most charming sneeze.
    
20. Do clouds form when you sigh adorably?
    
    

FAQ’s

What are some Random FunnyThings to Say in a Text?

Send silly jokes, weird thoughts, or playful lines that surprise and amuse. It keeps chats fun and helps spark unexpected, laugh-out-loud conversations with anyone.

Why should I use Random FunnyThings to Say in a Text?

They’re perfect for cheering someone up or breaking a dull moment. These lines bring humor, make texting fun, and help build closer, happier friendships fast.

Who can I send Random FunnyThings to Say in a Text to?

Send them to friends, your partner, or even your crush. They work for casual chats, flirty talks, or just making someone’s day better with a smile.

When is the best time to use Random FunnyThings to Say in a Text?

Use them when conversations feel slow or awkward. They’re great in the morning, late-night chats, or anytime you want to add a fun surprise.

Can Random FunnyThings to Say in a Text help me start a conversation?

Yes, they break the ice and grab attention fast. A random, funny line can spark curiosity, laughter, and a natural back-and-forth with anyone you message.

Conclusion

Random FunnyThings to Say in a Text are perfect for making people smile. When you’re bored, these random things to text your friends help keep the chat alive. Want funny things to say to friends to make them laugh? Just send a weird or silly line. These random texts to make someone laugh are great for close friends, new crushes, or even your group chat.

The most random things to say can lead to laugh-out-loud moments. Whether it’s a joke or a playful tease, Random Funny Things to Say in a Text always work. Try these random things to text people when you want to brighten someone’s day. It’s easy, fun, and totally worth it. Save your favorites and share the best Random FunnyThings to Say in a Text anytime you want to spread smiles!